#*prize not guaranteed

[brenneko]

If you can parse this, you win a prize*

(Also 3 isn't Appliancers, I literally forgot them when making that joke pic.)

[pencilofawesomeness]

Recently caught up with Code Adam and this goober has been living in my brain. Imagine getting shot, faking your death because you're sick of being feared as the military's living weapon, only knowing violence, and then when you learn friendship you're so emotionally tied up you can't even use violence to save them.

Gold medal to Iantis / Otto for being the narrative's punching bag, so much so that the narrative couldn't even bring it up until later because being forgotten is part of the punch.

I'm so normal about him. So normal.

Original panel I redrew this from under the cut:

[news4dzhozhar]

[expressionless-fr]

im cryinf rn. I won't make it to the gyarantee.

[girlwiththegreenhat]

lovingly makes fun of my brother and his friends for having gambling addictions at the arcade like i wouldn't go broke if they installed gachapon machines

[moonsinkfoxgirl]

Wait, I want foxy points!!

Um... How-- how about Return of the Obra Dinn? Ah, I think that's above 10 bucks... Hm...

Oh! Sunless Skies! That one is great.

What else.. Well, the Okami HD port for PC is on sale.

That's all I can think of.

Return of the Obra Dinn has been on my wishlist since it released funnily enough, maybe I should finally get it eventually should it go on a good sale...

I think I've tried playing Sunless Sea once and then was immediately intimidated by all the text and all the possibilities, but also it's not actually on my steam so I have no idea how I have accomplished this, unless I am just hallucinating my memories of making a Fallen London account and quitting within half a day into boat shape... or maybe it was an epic store freebie at some point? Sunless Skies also sounds fun but unless it's significantly more accessible I'd probably prefer the sea one...

Okami HD is also funny because I do actually just own that one for sure, I quit really quickly because everything felt so slow and I was in the wrong mood for that when I tried... wonder if I could get it running on my ubuntu laptop...

in any case definitely a neat set of games, that makes 20 foxy points for Lico-chan, sankyuuu^^

[wellboyhowdy-fr]

putting out so much "i deserve that roundsey magenta triple" energy into the universe rn since i have run out of treasure................

[simplyghosting]

Thinking about her -> Complete Amazon Trail CD-ROM included in cereal package

[skirwitte]

Re-listening to capacity at 2am and deleting tiktok because I’m salty that other people know about MY band that only I understand.

[cina-full-moon-xanadium]

it really is the most Pokémon thing ever that they made a route full of rapid water that if you're lucky you might navigate in just the right spot to find an area you can dive, and you follow that along and find a cave where everything is written in Braille - like, the language made for the visually-impaired which can only be read by touching it, which you obviously cannot do through an LCD screen - which if you somehow manage to read it you find out you need to A) use Dig, which if you do happen to have on you you then need B) a fucking Wailord and Relicanth, two late-game kinda hard to get Pokémon I guarantee extremely few people would ever have used one of on their team never mind both water-types at the same time for some reason, and if you DO manage to do all of that it unlocks three caves across the region which it doesn't even tell you where they are and you have to solve more braille puzzles and your prize is 3 pokemon that just arent even good

[the-bluestreak-cat]

Everyday I berate myself for doing raffles

[gaydogmarriage]

threw my entire savings at baizhu in the end and he still didnt come home so he can stay outside in the cold coughing up blood

[vhaerath]

working at the city fair really gives me a lot of perspective on both retail and drunk people. there r so many people who just give you the fluoride stare while thrusting money at u and ive started just taking the bill and being like "alright that'll net you this prize :)"

conversely i love drunk women. every post that was out there about drunk women is correct. theyre so funny and friendly theyre just so happy to win something. i gave these two drunk chicks the last small plushies we had and they were like ":D :D thank u!!!! Have a good night!!!!!" and they were helping me put the fish + ducks back into the water it was great.

[yanderenightmare]

TW: nsfw, noncon/dubcon, omegaverse/hybrid au, size difference, pet-play, predator x prey, collaring, drugging

fem reader

Thinking about a human collector who decides he wants a new pet to add to his collection...

The air of the animal shelter is polluted by whimpers, howls, and growling as he parades past all sorts of rareties locked up in their cages – all for him to pick and choose from. 

The warden is telling him about the new swan hybrid they wrangled a week ago, wings like an angel with the grace of royalty, a true prize jewel of any collection. 

He thinks it sounds promising before strolling past you.

Placed in one of the smaller cages on the floor, seemingly tucked away so as not to catch anyone’s attention. 

You’re a sorry sight to behold – all starved and shaking – the collar around your throat too heavy for you to lift your head, having to look up at him through your lashes as he crouches down in front of you.

Your eyes are wide like two moons as he sticks a finger in through the bars.

It’s thick like a carrot, and for a moment, you seem like you’re about to scurry away into the very back of your cage – but instead, you inch closer, sniffing at the digit before suddenly snapping at him.

He backs away with a hiss, drawing the warden's attention – who rushes back and knocks his cain against the cage with a growl in his throat, “Stupid critter.” 

You’ve narrowed your eyes, nose wrinkled in anger – something akin to a snarl forming your lips. It’s a funny expression to see on such a normally docile breed.

“I’m really sorry, sir. Bunnies aren't usually aggressive, but we’ve had issues disciplining this one for weeks.” The warden rushes out the apologetic excuse, expecting to be sued.

But the collector only chuckles – a deep sound that makes your soft fur stiffen. “That’s fine.” 

He pulls a handkerchief from his back pocket, all movements calm and collected as he wipes the spill of blood trickling from the small bite mark you’d left on his finger.

“It’s only a nibble, after all.” 

You spit the bitter taste left in your tongue out on his shoes with another sneer.

If it angers him, it still doesn’t show through the lofty smile he wears. His leer is just as poised and heavy as he looks down at you.

“Does she talk?”

The warden had turned to lead him towards the more desirable and tamed section but halted at the question.

He had a puzzled look on his face before he answered, almost in a question himself, “We don’t know.”

The collector scoffed out another small laugh, then pulled out his phone. “How much?”

The warden seemed appalled then. “Sir, we have exotic pets more up to your standard in the back. Are you sure-”

“I want this one.”

The warden looked snuffed at his firm tone. But straightened himself out after a moment. All business as usual. “We can’t guarantee she’ll behave. It could be dangerous-”

But he’s cut off yet again, this time with another rumbling chuckle.

“That won’t be an issue.”

And those dark eyes with that deeply dominating look within them were the last thing you remember seeing before becoming a sleepy heap on the floor of your cage – drooling with a blank stare as you’re carried to the trunk and driven off with.

The tranquilizer makes you fall asleep, waking to heat swallowing you as you’re lowered into a bathtub.

“Let’s get you groomed first.” The same man murmurs in a coo. Petting your head with a heavy hand when seeing your weary eyes try blinking off the sleep – but still left too drowsy to thrash.

Instead, you can just moan as he washes you with a tender smile on his face – his big hands coarse against your creamy skin, rubbing your plush limbs with soap and oil.

“My pets have been an awful handful lately…”

He’s talking about something, but you only catch bits and pieces of the words being said. Something about ruts and scratched furniture – someone’s been pissing in the sofa, and all the pillows are ruined.

He messages the lops of your ears, then rinses them gently.

“But it’s my fault. I’ve been neglectful.”

He cups your tits next, lathering them with the warm milky water, circling your nipples with the gritty pads of his thumbs until they perk.  

Then he delves under the water to find your puffy cunt, letting the hot water rush the sensitivity, making it swell with heat as he splits the lips and pets your clit. 

You buck your hips, and he awes with a light chuckle, crooning down at you. “It's okay, little bunny.”

His carrot-sized finger teases your hole before sinking inside you, filling you in slow and tentative pumps. Sitting next to the tub, just as composed as before, while your cunt squeezes his knuckles.

He hums, watching your body fight the tranquilizer as you seize up and ripple with release.

He retracts his hand, patting them both on the fluffy towel placed next to him. A content smile on his face. “You’re gonna do perfect.”

After he’s finished drying you, he fixes a collar around your throat and carries you out to the others.

“Gather ‘round, pets.” He announces, placing you down on the soft carpeted floors beneath.

Your limbs are still heavy, too weak to stand just yet. But that all changes with the adrenaline kick.

“Come say hi to your new rut-puppet.”

The stench in the air coats your skin with sweat.

“She’s a fragile thing, though, so make sure to play nice.”

Your big eyes skitter around. 

On your left, there’s a wolf, fox, and hyena who all lick their teeth at the sight of you.

Next to them lies a bear that wakens from his slumber. He licks his snout with a huff.

Drool drips from the hang in their lips as they start panting. 

And they aren't the only ones.

On your right, there’s a panther and leopard whose eyes all blackout into nothing but a deep pool of darkness.

Their tails slowly meander behind them as they arise from their beds to stalk you.

You whimper, backing up until your back hits the legs of your new owner.

You lift your head to look up at him, only to see him smiling down at you.

“Don’t be shy now. The smell of fear only makes them wilder.”

part 2

[post-it-free]

Also, i believe if one candidate doesn't get 279, it goes to the House of Representatives? Which is controlled, at this time, by republicans.

have you seen anything about conservatives refusing to certify election results and sending the decision to scotus, who will most likely side with trump? i’m going to vote and i’m writing post cards to swing states and plan to help phone bank, but i’m not sure what to do if it comes down to scotus’s decision

I mean the conservatives refusing is a worry, for sure, upside most swing states, Michigan, Wisconsin, Arizona, and Nevada are controlled by Democrats (in their Sec of state offices) On top of which Georgia's Governor and Sec of State are the same Republicans who refused Trump's 2020 pressure to "find" votes

so basically, I'm not a lawyer, but if Kamala can get to 270 electoral votes it won't matter if Republican controlled states don't want to certify.

Hopefully it won't come down to the outcome in one state thats disputed, that a local Republican refuses to count votes etc, because we saw in 2000, Bush V. Gore what the court did

its worth saying though, Trump tried a number of law suits in 2020 to dispute votes, and in "Texas Vs. Pennsylvania" (Trump's ally Texas AG Ken Paxton sued Georgia, Michigan, Pennsylvania, and Wisconsin to overturn their results) the Supreme Court refused to hear the case and upheld a lower court throwing it out

ALL! to say, if we win big, get lots of states in the bag, we don't have to worry, so we all have to work our hardest because we DO NOT! want to be in the danger zone of the election being down to 500 votes in a swing state and asking questions about what's a valid ballot etc.

[woso-dreamzzz]

Leaving: Christmas

Alexia Putellas x Teen!Reader

Summary: Christmas with Menor

It's not often that Eli gets to have all three of you in the same place, not with you off travelling the world for your tennis, practically in a different country every month.

But the winter months is one that she can almost guarantee you'll be home for.

You finish your tennis season on a high, lifting the trophy at the WTA Finals before you spend a few more weeks in Poland with your training team coming up with a rough schedule of what you want to compete in next year.

But you're home now which means that Eli has all three of her daughters in the same country. Which also means mandatory days out together on the run up to Christmas.

It's easier to get you sorted than Alexia - still playing football every week - and Alba, still teaching as the schools haven't gone on holiday yet.

You're back in your childhood bedroom and seem to delight in sleeping the day away and only getting up around two in the afternoon to migrate from your bed to the sofa.

Occasionally, you roll out of bed early in the morning to take part in some sponsorship commitments.

Your tennis season has been nothing short of extraordinary this year and you've somehow become Nike Tennis' golden girl along the way with all of your tennis gear bar your racket being supplied by them.

Like how now, you and Alexia are wearing the exact same Nike shoes as you all walk through the Christmas market together.

"Mami!" You complain over the noise of the crowd," Mami, make them stop!"

Somewhere between the stall making handmade Santas and the stall with fresh paella, Alexia has gotten you into a headlock and is none too kindly ruffling your hair while Alba pinches your cheek between two fingers.

"She started it!" Alexia yells back.

"Alexia," Eli says with a sigh," You are thirty years old-"

"Yeah, Alexia!" You butt in," You're old."

"No, y/n, that's not what I meant," Eli tries to correct you but she's interrupted yet again.

"Yeah, older than you!" Alexia says," Which means you're meant to do what I say! Listen to your elders!"

"Oh? So you're elderly now? Maybe you should sit down, Ale, and rest your old back!"

You shove her off of you, stamping on her foot before taking off down the street.

"Hey! Get back here!" Alexia yells, taking off after you as she forces her way through the crowd.

Alba shakes her head in mock disapproval. "You know, Mami-"

"No, Alba," Eli says," I will not only buy you stuff tonight. Stop trying to get your sisters in trouble."

Alba shrugs. "It was worth a shot."

By the time Eli and Alba catch up, you and Alexia have forgotten whatever argument you've been having in favour of nosing around some of the stalls together.

Somehow in the time it's taken for Eli and Alba to return, you've both gotten cups of hot chocolate with caramel sauce and marshmallows along with little Christmas ornaments to hang on the tree.

"Must you two spend so much money?" Alba complains as she points at the little paper bags that Eli hadn't even noticed.

"It's not our fault that we've got a lot of it saved up."

Alba rolls her eyes. "It's exactly your fault! You don't have to keep winning so much in prize money."

You shrug. "It's not my fault I'm good at what I do."

"It's your fault you're not spending it on me," Alba says, tongue poking out of her mouth.

"If I buy you stuff, will I get sister points?"

Alba doesn't even have to think about it. "Yes."

You grin. "What do you want?"

Eli sighs. "Alba, please stop exploiting your little sister's goodwill."

"Yeah Alba," Alexia butts in, her own tongue sticking out," Don't exploit our little sister."

"You do it all the time!"

"I'm allowed to!"

"Girls," Eli says wearily," Please stop exploiting each other."

It's a weak request, one that Eli knows will be ignored but she has to at least attempt it, if only to look like a good mother in a crowd of strangers.

She easily tunes out the bickering of the three of you as she turns to the hot chocolate stall and buys herself a cup of it.

You and Alexia have good taste, she can give you that because it's delightfully creamy and Eli takes a long gulp before turning back around.

She's not surprised that the three of you have disappeared.

In all honesty, she's surprised you all stuck around for so long.

Usually, the three of you go off by yourselves the moment you step into a market. Eli's kind of been a bit antsy for you to all disappear. She does her best Christmas shopping when none of you are around.

"Alexia!" You complain," Hurry up! Alba's saving us a spot in line."

"But..." Alexia pretends to stumble, making herself seem suddenly weak and weary. "I...I don't know if I can go on! You know, with my old bones!"

"Alexia, you're so dramatic!"

She grins. "Yes."

"Come on!" You say," I want to go on the drop ride!"

"You always want to go on the drop ride!"

"Exactly," You say, pulling her more forcefully than before," Because it's tradition! Don't ruin tradition!"

Alexia laughs, finally having stopped digging her heels in to throw her arm over your shoulder.

"You know I'll never break tradition."